Does it feel like your life is falling apart?
Are you totally frustrated because you are really smart, but no matter what you try, your relationships with people you care about just seem to be getting worse, even falling apart?
Did you always imagine that you would have your life together by now, that you’d be really happy with your job or career, enjoying a happy family and lots of good friends?
But is some part of this dream just not happening? Does it feel like you’ve tried everything and nothing’s working?
Are you really hard on yourself?
Maybe growing up you heard the adults around you say things like, “If you’re going to cry, I’ll give you something to cry about”, or “Stop whining, or you’ll be sorry!”, or even, “I don’t have time for this now!” Was it not ok to have feelings when you were little?
Did you feel punished, ignored, or put down when you tried to share the anger, frustration, or sadness happening inside of you? If this sounds familiar, unfortunately it's all too common and you're not alone.
Are you a fixer?
In working with high performing adults for over 20 years, I have found that when bright people are raised in families where their basic needs are met, but their feelings aren’t welcome, we get really good at using our brains to fix problems, to think our way out of difficulties, and we usually are able to figure out how to be pretty darn successful at whatever we set our minds to.
While this “all thinking, fixing, and problem solving” approach to life does work for a while, unfortunately it eventually fails us, and often it fails us big time!
Our spouses complain that they want more intimacy and emotional connection, our children push us away when we try give them good advice, and people at work get tired of us “doing it all” ourselves because we know we can do the work better and faster, we know we can, and we must, because there just isn’t enough time. There is never enough time.
Are you tired of trying to figure it out alone?
In addition to our relationships suffering, all of the stress, pressure, and worry can create a lot of discomfort inside. Maybe you're not sleeping well, or have regular stomach problems, frequent colds, chronic muscle tightness, aches and pains. Maybe you're finding that you're irritable or angry or frustrated all the time and just not the person you want to be.
Worse yet, you may be experiencing anxiety or struggling with depression. I wouldn’t be surprised at all! Anxiety and depression are the body’s natural reactions to worrying all the time, feeling so alone, and chronic relationship difficulties.
You didn’t want your life to be this way. You’ve worked way too hard and it should be better than this.
I can help you make that happen.
You CAN have the life you want
But probably not by doing more of what you’ve already been doing – and probably not by simply hoping it will all get better – and probably not by working with a therapist who just listens to you session after session, maybe pointing out a few insights here and there.
What you need is someone who can stand in your shoes, really listen and understand, and help you clarify what you want for your on unique and precious life. You need someone who will help you uncover what has influenced and shaped you into the person you are today so that if you want to, you can free yourself from the past that is haunting you and holding you back.
You need someone who will offer you strategies customized to your unique situation and goals, and practical things that you can do right away in order to make your life better today, and in the future.
I am that person. I am that therapist and coach.
Things you no longer need to figure out alone...
- How can I be calmer and less anxious all the time?
- How do I get out of this depression?
- How do I keep my emotions from whipping me around all the time?
- This relationship is so bad, but I can't leave. What do I do?
- Should I get divorced or not?
- How in the world am I going to get through this awful divorce?
- Do I tell my family and friends this secret I've been holding onto? If so, how?
- How do I stop snapping at people and crying at work?
- How do I move on after this breakup?
- How do I deal with always being yelled at and criticized by my partner?
- How do I make sure I don't ever make that mistake again?
- How can I get along with my family?
- How do I make my partner listen to me?
I can help you
Together we can get your life back on track and I can show you how to reconnect and build good relationships with your spouse, your kids, your coworkers, and most importantly, with yourself (I know that may sound woo woo, but you’ll totally get it once you’ve experienced it).
The work isn’t easy, and it isn’t intuitive. If it were, you're be doing it already.
What you’ll learn in our work together will also take regular practice on your part and a commitment to experimenting with new ways of doing things in your daily life.
When you do the work, this works
If you are ready to start building and living the life you have already worked so hard to achieve… If you are committed to doing the work, you CAN achieve peace within yourself, and the life you want.
Give me a call today and let’s get you the life you want!